Understanding your situation
Someone is harassing you through persistent unwanted contact and informal requests to stop have been ignored or refused. You need a formal documented demand to create a legal paper trail.
Common harassment scenarios:
- Persistent unwanted calls, texts, or emails: Someone contacts you repeatedly despite being told to stop. The contacts may be threatening, abusive, or simply persistent and unwelcome.
- Social media harassment and cyberstalking: Someone is sending threatening messages, posting about you, creating fake accounts to contact you, sharing your personal information (doxxing), or monitoring your online activity.
- Ex-partner or former friend who will not stop contacting you: After a relationship or friendship ends, the other person continues to call, message, show up at your home or workplace, or contact your family and friends.
- Workplace harassment outside HR channels: A colleague, client, or business contact is harassing you outside of work — persistent personal messages, following you, making threats.
- Neighbor harassment: Persistent confrontational behavior, threats, intimidation, filming or surveillance, deliberate provocation, or following you on your property.
- Online harassment campaigns: Multiple threatening messages, coordinated attacks on your social media, review bombing your business, or encouraging others to harass you.
What you need to prepare
- ✓Detailed log of harassment incidents — dates, times, nature of each contact
- ✓Screenshots, recordings (where legal), saved messages, voicemails, or emails
- ✓The harasser's full name and address (or best known contact information)
- ✓Records of any prior requests to stop — verbal, written, or via third parties
- ✓Police reports if any have been filed
- ✓Witness statements from anyone who observed the harassment
- ✓Your jurisdiction (state/country) — anti-harassment statutes vary significantly
⏰ Deadline
Send immediately once you have documented sufficient incidents. Give the harasser 7–10 days to confirm cessation. If harassment continues after the deadline, escalate to law enforcement or seek a restraining order.
🏛️ Authority
Local police (criminal harassment complaint). Civil court (restraining order / protective order). UK: Magistrates Court (Protection from Harassment Act). DE: Amtsgericht (einstweilige Verfügung).
⚖️ Legal basis
US: State anti-harassment and anti-stalking statutes (e.g., CA Penal Code § 646.9, NY Penal Law § 240.25-240.30). UK: Protection from Harassment Act 1997, Malicious Communications Act 1988. DE: § 238 StGB (Nachstellung), § 1004 BGB.
Expert tips
- 1Document everything before sending the letter. Your harassment log is the foundation of any future legal action.
- 2Be specific in the letter: name the behavior, cite dates and incidents, and make a clear demand to cease all contact.
- 3Send by certified mail with return receipt requested. Keep the receipt permanently.
- 4State specific consequences you are prepared to follow through on: restraining order, police report, civil lawsuit.
- 5If you feel physically unsafe at any point, contact law enforcement immediately. A cease and desist letter is for civil disputes, not imminent physical danger.
- 6In the UK, harassment is both a criminal offense and a civil tort under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997.
- 7Consider whether a restraining order is more appropriate for your situation — especially if the harassment involves threats of violence.